The universe has mucho fun with me and lines at banks, grocery stores, etc.
If I'm at a bank to deposit a check (which has only one teller working, of course), the one or two people in front of me conduct some complex transactions involving Swiss bank accounts or business deals with some European cartels.
If I'm at a grocery store (like today) I pass up the lines with people who have $300 worth of food in their cart and slide in behind a guy who has only two or three items (and he's next up). Then things grind to a stop because the guy wants some money back from his card and the cashier has to call the manager and wait and call the manager again and wait until a manager wearing an oxygen tank finally shows up to turn a key. Meanwhile the next line filled with old geezers is being cranked out at incredible speed.
Even if I do things backwards like George did once on Seinfeld and get in the long lines, something still happens and everything grinds to a halt, e.g., the paper tapes run out, the cash drawer breaks, the person doesn't have enough money, or even a key falls under the conveyer belt and they have to dissassemble it. Moral: don't ever stand in a line that I'm in--and I've frequently told that to people behind me who are getting impatient.
Finally, in some weird way, when I'm ready to check out at a store, there's a sudden surge for the lone cashier and I'm fourteenth in line. As soon as I leave, there's nobody in the store. And you think I'm paranoid?