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Escape from El Lay, Redux

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Escape from El Lay, Redux

by Jenise » Thu Mar 26, 2020 7:47 pm

We had already adopted the axiom that, when it comes to this virus, there's no such thing as over-reacting when we flew down to L.A. a week ago Wednesday, March 11th, for a long-planned dinner we co-host with friends every year (this year's theme: Cru Beaujolais).

We naively thought we could stay safe enough, however the numerous exposures of travel on the trip down was unnerving: hotel personnel where we parked our car at this end shaking our hands, TSA, airport lounge, airplane (I was in Seat 1C, and the guy in 2C had a cough), crowds at LAX, standing room only with a stranger's child in my lap on the car rental shuttle, the rental car itself--who'd been in it last, were they healthy?, hotel car valet, hotel registration desk, bellman and other strangers handling our luggage, the elevators, the hotel room itself, an Uber ride, dinner in a great restaurant with friends, multiple servers leaning over our table to take orders and instruct us on each dish, the guy in the bathroom line who wanted to know if we got the shortrib before it ran out, the Uber ride back. It felt like people had their hands all over us all day, and my little wad of barely-better-than-nothing Cottonelles and wimpy food demonstrator gloves was obviously going to run out fast.

The risks were overwhelming, so the next day we cancelled our lunch plans with another friend and headed for our co-host's home. I’d forgotten to pack antihistimines so we stopped at a Costco in Burbank where the crowds were so bad the checkout lines went all the way back to the frozen food section in the rear of the store. And it was pouring rain. I mean total white-out rain. You never see that in California. Traffic was ridiculous, all those people out trying to panic-buy slowed down by a monsoon. What would have been a one-hour trip in a straight shot took five.

Next day: Annabelle and I braved multiple stores in order to accumulate the groceries needed for our dinner. That’s normal, but the abnormal conditions in the markets meant we had to go to multiple places just because we couldn’t get enough of even the most normal items, like chicken and mushrooms, at one place. If I got the virus I’d blame it on the impatient turkey-necked lady who jumped the chicken line at Whole Foods. If Annabelle got the virus, she would surely blame it on the woman who tried to beat her to the mushrooms at Gelson’s.

Our menu: appetizers of fresh farmer radishes with cultured Vermont butter on brown bread, plus these tasty little cigar-shaped pastries of spicy ground turkey and shallots rolled in phyllo, champagnes. First course: warm mushroom salad. Second course: seared scallop and white bean 'lasagna'. Third course: oven roasted chicken thigh with leek-tarragon sauce and peas on a crouton of grilled bread garnished with gin-fried sugar snap peas. Wines in three flights of 4-5 with each course. Dessert: orange bundt cake topped with fresh orange segments and mint.

Nobody hugged but all the guests were in fairly close quarters, and we jokingly bumped body parts.

John and Annabelle's TV, set to CNN, was on all day every day and we were all glued to it. Bob and I were supposed to stay in town thru Wednesday the 18th, but by Saturday morning we got spooked enough to move our flight home up two days to Monday. Hated to do that as it meant missing a dinner party somewhat in our honor at the home of Ines and Kirk Nyby but we knew Ines would understand as she was as unnerved by all this as I'd become. Ines doesn't post here often these days but she's a great and true friend, and most notably someone I met here on this very forum about 20 years ago. It was we who started this tasting group and it now includes Bob Henry, who I also met on this forum a million years ago (and was known as 'Hucko').

On Sunday Mayor Garcetti closed all the restaurants and bars in Los Angeles, and overnight the number of infections in the county had doubled. So, over coffee, I informed Bob of my new plan: “We’re driving home.” We already had a rental car, but that one had to go back to LAX. We booked another from a different agency, hugged our friends goodbye and took off for LAX and a black Nissan Pathfinder we dubbed 'The Hearse'.

We blasted out of LAX a few hours later in the 6th straight day of rain, and one about as torrentially bad as it had been the day we arrived so progress was painfully slow once underway. It was especially bad going over the Grapevine (a 4000 ft mountain pass on Interstate 5 that divides L.A. and Kern Counties)—cars hydroplaned out of control right and left and earlier wrecks littered the shoulders. An hour after we cleared it, we heard on the radio that the rain had turned to snow and CalDot had closed the ‘vine. Whew, just made it.

We got as far as the agricultural town of Stockton when we decided to stop for car food—a Trader Joe’s for raw nuts, dried fruit and the ultimate in personal, single-serving fresh car fruit: bananas. But alas, as the song goes yes had no bananas. We’d stopped at several convenience stores already hoping to find some, but there were none anywhere. I don't know what about a pandemic causes bananas to absof---inglutely disappear from the planet, but it seemed they had. And maybe, we joked, all those farmers wouldn't be panic-buying yet so we could load up on other cool stuff to take home. Fat chance! We did get the last packages of raw walnuts and dried apricots, but the shelves were otherwise pretty empty. Hilariously their frozen food aisle was completely empty but for four lone boxes of my least favorite appetizer in the world, bacon-wrapped dates. Those farmers know a thing or two after all!

We then walked into the Safeway next door for a cleaning product to use in the hotel room I had booked from my cell phone as we arrived in town. The cleaning product aisle was all but empty but for about three things: some Windex Without Ammonia (No ammonia? WTF—that’s the good part!), Clorox toilet bowl cleaner and Method granite cleaner. Didn't score on bananas either.

Our hotel was about a mile away, a Best Western Plus. I negotiated a great rate of $89 including breakfast while Bob waited in the car. This hotel turned out to be an older place originally built as a conference center, and from the registration desk I could hear a large and loud group of men conferencing away. There were hooting and clapping, singing and chanting. I peeked in and found a scene straight out of the Twilight Zone: a whole roomful of a Homer Simpsons, every one an Amway dealer, celebrating their ability to disinfect America. After ensuring that they didn't have any samples with them, I let them be and found my way to room 219.

I swabbed the room with granite cleaner while Bob hauled up the luggage. The halls smelled of pot, and the elevator garrumphed and lurched like it was 20 years overdue for its next service call. I did not like this place one bit. We watched the news, ate our Trader Joe’s food, and finally got ready for bed.

Bed, where we found that the sheets had the unmistakable rumpledness of already used. How do I know? I stay in a lot of hotels! I know what commercially laundered fresh sheets look like! And I know what fresh sheets look like at home, and how they look after we've slept on them for a few days. These sheets looked a week old. Horrific as that was, at least this old place had an air conditioner/heater that processed fresh air from outside and we weren't on the shared air supply of a newer hotel. Meaning, the horrors within were marginally preferable to the horrors without so we stayed, sleeping fully dressed, and come morning skipped the hot breakfast queue in favor of lifting an entire bunch of bananas off the buffet and bolting out the door like bank robbers.

The rain continued. By the time we got to Redding it was sleeting and by Lake Shasta it was snowing. 75 miles later we crept over fogbound Siskyou Pass in visibility of about 100 feet. The whole trip had been hard and just got harder. It was war in the trenches, fighting for every inch. But shockingly, about five miles later, we had dipped into Oregon's Rogue River Valley and crystal clear sunshine. Which also happens to be the location of the last In N Out Burger on I-5. Ahhhhh--every darned bit as good as we remembered them.

We were making great time and notified our cat sitter we'd be home that night. But by the time we got somewhere just south of Olympia around 10 p.m., we were groggy. Too weirded out from the night before to take a hotel, so we pulled into a rest area to bag a few Z's. The car lot (there are separate car and truck areas) at this particular rest area had all the cars in a center lane, diagonal spaces that faced each other like a herring bone pattern. One area had a big tree that shaded about six or eight spaces from the generous overhead lighting, so we pulled in there. Within minutes, our end of the rest area was full.

It was 31F outside and we didn't have pillows or blankets. Now anyone who knows me in real life will know how absolutely amazing it was that I actually had a jacket with me. Even in winter, this isn't a given as I'm that person who's never cold. I'm literally a human torch. But true to my nature I had no protection at the other pole--open-toed shoes only, no socks. Popsicle toes. So I was shivering when, about 1 a.m., I woke up and informed Bob that I needed to pee. He agreed to come with me and opened the door.

HOO-ah, HOO-ah, HOO-ah! All hell broke loose, all noise and flashing lights as the car alarm which Bob had somehow set from the fob with us inside tried to ward off evil-doers. Lights came on in the cars all around us, and angry voices yelled expletives. In a panic and yelling “Sorry! Sorry!", it took what felt like forever to find the fob and kill the alarm. But finally we did, and everyone calmed back down.

Once back in the car we tried to get more sleep, but as we laid there it slowly dawned on us that it was close to the same 31F inside the car as it was outside. At 3 a.m. I returned my seat to the full upright position and informed Bob that we would have to start the engine and get some heat. He agreed, and started the engine. Which, holy shit, turned on the radio and lit up the white Mercedes Sprinter van opposite us like a drive-in movie. Apparently when we'd turned off the car, we hadn't (who does?) turned the lights off first. Heck, it was a rental, we didn't even know where the switch was, they'd come on by themselves when it got dark. More angry neighbors and more expletives as we groped unsuccessfully for the remedy and turned on everything else instead—wipers and all.

"Just back out, they’ll think we’re leaving!," I screamed. So we backed out of our space and drove to the well-lit end of the lot. There, we figured out the lights, turned them off and snuck The Hearse back into our original space. Engine running and blood pressure back to normal, we slept until 5 a.m.

Now we needed coffee. But where Starbucks had been okie-dokie on Monday, by the wee hours of Wednesday after 40 hours straight CNN virus coverage, we'd been Sanjay Gupta'd into thinking we shouldn't allow potentially infected strangers to handle our coffee cups so we forewent our triple grande non-fat cappuccinos for an inferior cup of crap at a convenience store where at least we could serve ourselves.

By 9:30 we'd reclaimed our Audi at one airport, dropped the Pathfinder at another, and we were home. We unloaded everything to the garage, shed our clothes as we walked into the showers, and slept until 5 p.m.

The whole trip was surreal. We were refugees, fleeing an invisible enemy in a mine field. From inside that car with only CNN for company, even the smallest of decisions took on life or death implications.

I've never appreciated home so much.
My wine shopping and I have never had a problem. Just a perpetual race between the bankruptcy court and Hell.--Rogov
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Re: Escape from El Lay, Redux

by Robin Garr » Thu Mar 26, 2020 9:21 pm

Thanks for repost, Jenise. What an adventure! (No emoji.)
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Re: Escape from El Lay, Redux

by Jenise » Thu Mar 26, 2020 10:29 pm

It seems melodramatic from the safety of my own home, but the way it built up at the time--two people, 1 car, bad weather, worse news--was really, uh, eventful!
My wine shopping and I have never had a problem. Just a perpetual race between the bankruptcy court and Hell.--Rogov
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Re: Escape from El Lay, Redux

by Jeff Grossman » Thu Mar 26, 2020 10:31 pm

OMG, what a story. I think you could turn this into a six-episode Netflix series.
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Re: Escape from El Lay, Redux

by Paul Winalski » Fri Mar 27, 2020 1:00 pm

It reads like a real-life version of "The Out-of-Towners".

The last time I got a bad case of influenza I was sick for over a month and not fully recovered for a month after that. I vowed "never again" and have gotten annual flu shots ever since. I know exactly where I caught the virus. It was in the layover at Charlotte airport on my trip to Naples, Florida to visit my snowbird parents for Christmas. There were so many people coughing and sneezing that the airport sounded like a plague ward. I came down with severe flu three days later and was barely well enough to fly back to New Hampshire. Stay out of airports and off of airplanes!

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Re: Escape from El Lay, Redux

by Jenise » Fri Mar 27, 2020 6:07 pm

Funny, Paul, that's exactly the comparison I made. Sandy Dennis and who. Jack Lemmon?

But yes, get flu shots! It's the pits being sick like that. It's incredible how long some of these viruses can last.
My wine shopping and I have never had a problem. Just a perpetual race between the bankruptcy court and Hell.--Rogov
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Re: Escape from El Lay, Redux

by Jeff Grossman » Fri Mar 27, 2020 8:46 pm

"I've got all your numbers!!"

Yes, Sandy Dennis and Jack Lemmon.
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Re: Escape from El Lay, Redux

by wnissen » Sun Apr 05, 2020 2:33 pm

I was just thinking about how we deliberately went on a three week Europe trip, including a cruise, just in December. What were we thinking? I suppose we could even have been infected, but that would have been vanishingly unlucky. Luckily we were at home without plans when things started to get bad. I went to a crab dinner on Saturday March 7th, and my wife played in the pit of the local opera performance, both very close quarters. We were kind of thinking of distancing, but obviously not enough to really do anything about it.
On Thursday evening I was starting to worry about grocery availability and "swung by" Safeway on the way to get takeout Chipotle. Twenty minutes later, I had a full cart of $250 worth of groceries. The next day, the 13th, I kept an existing appointment to get the car stereo looked at, but I had sent in my request to work from home for 2 weeks, for the first time ever. Looking back, it was hilariously solicitous, trying to minimize the impact and reassuring my bosses that it was practical. I also informed my child's Scout Troop that we wouldn't be attending the campout next week, and there was definitely grumbling.

Midday Monday, the Bay Area shelter-in-place orders came down, making any plans for on-site work or camping moot. I immediately donned my P100 mask (a leftover silver lining from the Sonoma fires) and headed off to Target with the idea that I would try to avoid going shopping at all over the next two weeks. Felt super conspicuous in a full-fledged pink respirator just one step below the one from Breaking Bad, but in retrospect it was a really good decision. We did one small stockup when a local restaurant started selling their food service packages of eggs (30), flour (10 lbs. with a December 2019 date, but still), milk, etc., but basically managed to make it the two weeks until my dear wife went to Costco and basically filled the trunk. The line stretched halfway around the store, .3 miles / 500m, but she was able to get in and out in 90 minutes, including beer, milk, eggs, sugar, ground turkey, fresh veggies, and we could have gotten toilet paper if we'd needed it.

One of the nicest things about living in the suburbs is the storage. I usually keep at least 2 jumbo rolls of toilet paper in each of 3 bathrooms, and so we usually have a half pack on hand even at a low point. Have been doing a ton of baking. The Nutella is sorely missed by my kid but we've been very fortunate to find almost everything we want, and have everything we need. The only thing I'm sweating a little is refried beans and Pomi tomatoes in the Tetrapak container. Those are available by mail but at triple the usual price (I think this is because they're heavy and shipping heavy things is expensive, even if the items are cheap.). We're trying not to use delivery services because homebound folks really need them. My father has had 5 consecutive Wal-Mart delivery orders cancelled.

As I write this my wife is finishing the conversion of one of my old Brooks Brothers dress shirts into 8 masks. The finely woven but breathable fabric is really ideal and obviously washable. Still getting takeout hot food at the places that will take a credit card over the phone and load directly into my trunk. Have left them $20-40 cash tips in the trunk and only had a couple bad experiences at places that said they would do curbside but then wouldn't. Hope you all are getting the care and cash you need in these times.
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Re: Escape from El Lay, Redux

by Matilda L » Mon Apr 06, 2020 11:27 pm

The Francophile and I were just saying the other day, isn't it funny how suddenly we're aware of things we wouldn't have given the first thought to before? We went out yesterday to shop for food, and the presence of other people in the same space suddenly snapped on all the awareness buttons. Everyone was being calm, and respectful of each other, and keeping their distance. As we walked down the nearly-deserted supermarket aisles, people would say, "Excuse me," from a significant distance before we had to pass each other. I was hyper-aware, when punching in my pin number at the pay point, that someone else had punched in their number before me.

We are entering week 4 of our voluntary isolation. For the most part, we're doing fine. We worry about friends whose definition of "isolation" is looser. We talk to friends and family on screens. We're learning new songs but have no clubs to play them at. We're in for the long haul.
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Re: Escape from El Lay, Redux

by Paul Winalski » Tue Apr 07, 2020 1:10 pm

The supermarket I go to (Market Basket) is limiting the number of customers simultaneously in the store. You queue up in a line on a sidewalk with markers 6 feet apart (a lot of folks, me included, stand 12 feet apart) and as a customer leaves the person at the front of the line is admitted. They have made the shopping isles one-way and have arrows on the floor to show you the direction of travel. Shopping carts are disinfected before they're given to a customer. The waiting line moves fast. I would guess that people are doing fast, purposeful shopping and not browsing. I certainly wanted to get in and out as soon as possible.

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Re: Escape from El Lay, Redux

by Jenise » Fri Apr 10, 2020 3:39 pm

Walter, really enjoyed your 'diary'. Different circumstances but you went through the identical experience we had in thinking we could do X and X in a smart way and then days later realize we should have done it differently and then days later yet, realize we shouldn't have done it at all. The learning curve is pretty steep.

Matilda, I so relate to your term "hyper-awareness". We're going to Costco today for the first time in months and for all the precautions we'll take will probably come out of there feeling the same way.

Paul, there was a joke shared by a chef friend about two friends who run into each other and have an ultra sweet/polite conversation that ends with one of them stepping forward for a hug which causes the other to pick up a knife and say, "Six feet back, motherfucker." I will be very lucky at Costco today if that doesn't end up coming out of my mouth at some point. :)
My wine shopping and I have never had a problem. Just a perpetual race between the bankruptcy court and Hell.--Rogov
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Re: Escape from El Lay, Redux

by Larry Greenly » Fri Apr 10, 2020 6:27 pm

Our governor has ordered grocery stores to admit only 20% of capacity. She's also having state police cite non-essential businesses for staying open.
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Re: Escape from El Lay, Redux

by Jenise » Sat Apr 11, 2020 9:40 am

Paul, I don't know what the capacity percentage is here but something similar's in place. We had to wait in a long line at Costco. Took forever, they were only letting in 50 at a time, and a Costco person finally explained after we'd stood in one spot for 24 minutes without moving that it usually moves faster, only the last batch, despite the border being closed, had inexplicably all wanted to be in "the cooler" (the separate cold room for milk and butter our store has because of huge Canadian demand for same, this isn't usual across the Costco spectrum) at the same time and enforcement of the six foot rule meant they were only letting one customer into the cooler at a time so it was taking forever to get those guys to the cash registers.

Alas, no swordfish that I had so looked forward to. But I did restock on frozen scallops which I'm never without, and bought an Australian leg of lamb for Easter Sunday. And I restocked Antica Caparno--sunset negroni's insured for the days ahead . I won't have to brave that again for a long time.
My wine shopping and I have never had a problem. Just a perpetual race between the bankruptcy court and Hell.--Rogov
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Re: Escape from El Lay, Redux

by Jim Cassidy » Tue Apr 14, 2020 3:40 am

Jenise, please talk about frozen Costco scallops. I rarely cook scallops, and when I do, I buy the freshest-looking ones I can find, and pay whatever is asked. I'm guessing the step down in quality from the fresh to the frozen is not as great as I imagine, or you would not keep them on hand.
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Re: Escape from El Lay, Redux

by Jenise » Tue Apr 14, 2020 3:49 pm

Jim Cassidy wrote:Jenise, please talk about frozen Costco scallops. I rarely cook scallops, and when I do, I buy the freshest-looking ones I can find, and pay whatever is asked. I'm guessing the step down in quality from the fresh to the frozen is not as great as I imagine, or you would not keep them on hand.


Jim, it can be (I've bought flavorless scallops from other sources) but you're absolutely correct about my experience with Costco's. Texturally they're a tad firmer than fresh but the flavor is very sweet. I have even cooked them for company and though my guests all register as discerning, not one person ever dreamed they were eating frozen. I've been buying them for several years now and have detected no variation in quality--and such is my palate memory that I am positive I would (I do on so many other things). For instance, I can't stand frozen fish--where some people don't notice a difference or do but don't think it significant, but me it's a complete no-go. The slightest bit of fishiness or freezer burn is a total turn off. These are so good I'll even use them for ceviche and sashimi, which is possibly the highest compliment I can pay. I don't recommend frozen scallops from anywhere else, but these I swear by.
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Re: Escape from El Lay, Redux

by Jim Cassidy » Fri Apr 17, 2020 2:54 am

Jenise said:

I don't recommend frozen scallops from anywhere else, but these I swear by.


Is there a choice of sizes, either on the scallops or the packages? How do you handle defrosting?
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Re: Escape from El Lay, Redux

by Jenise » Fri Apr 17, 2020 10:45 am

Nope. Just two pound bags generally about $33 ea. I believe the bags usually indicate size at about U 12. Occasionally you can see in the freezer case some that look a little larger (the bag I just finished were more like U 8-10, no matter what the bag said), or have more of the pink/orange ones in them--I'll go for either preferentially--but otherwise it's the usual Costco "this is what you get". Typically, three each is a perfect serving.

I usually defrost earlier in the day. Rinse them then leave them to break out of the IQF ice coating each wears, then rinse and transfer them to a small flat pan or plate with a paper towel underneath to draw out moisture for an hour or two prior to cooking.
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Re: Escape from El Lay, Redux

by Jim Cassidy » Thu May 14, 2020 6:04 pm

Jenise said:

I have even cooked them for company and though my guests all register as discerning, not one person ever dreamed they were eating frozen.


Thanks for the recommendation. If served both blind, I think I could tell which was which, but the frozen are so good that I don't think I'll bother with the comparison. :)
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Re: Escape from El Lay, Redux

by Jenise » Thu May 14, 2020 6:58 pm

Jim Cassidy wrote:Thanks for the recommendation. If served both blind, I think I could tell which was which, but the frozen are so good that I don't think I'll bother with the comparison. :)


No doubt, me too. But without an available comparison the frozen do quite well where most from-frozen seafood is unacceptable, no comparison required. Don't get me going on frozen salmon....
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Re: Escape from El Lay, Redux

by Jeff Grossman » Thu May 14, 2020 7:34 pm

Jenise wrote:
Jim Cassidy wrote:Thanks for the recommendation. If served both blind, I think I could tell which was which, but the frozen are so good that I don't think I'll bother with the comparison. :)


No doubt, me too. But without an available comparison the frozen do quite well where most from-frozen seafood is unacceptable, no comparison required. Don't get me going on frozen salmon....


Agreed, for fin fish it is very easy to tell. Shellfish can be yes or no to tell them apart. (My local fishmonger sells only frozen whole octopus, cuttlefish, king crab clusters, and rock shrimp. I think the crab suffers occasionally but the rest are good.)
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Re: Escape from El Lay, Redux

by Jenise » Fri May 15, 2020 9:48 am

King crab does work well from frozen, Jeff. Though if you ever get a chance to try fresh, well, OMG.

Strangely, Dungeness? Awful.
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Re: Escape from El Lay, Redux

by Jeff Grossman » Fri May 15, 2020 3:32 pm

Interesting about the Dungeness. Maybe it's the organs, &c? My place doesn't have Dungeness, they have Blue, but always fresh.

What I really like but can hardly ever get is razor clams. They don't sell well, I guess, and their season is not long. But if a Chinese restaurant offers them with black bean sauce... you bet!
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Re: Escape from El Lay, Redux

by wnissen » Fri May 15, 2020 3:43 pm

Interesting, razor clams are plentiful out here but a little goes a long way. Pretty tough unless prepared appropriately.
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Re: Escape from El Lay, Redux

by Jenise » Fri May 15, 2020 4:18 pm

Yup. Dungeness does NOT freeze well. Which doesn't stop most of my neighbors from freezing it, usually in milk, which they never squeeze enough out of (ew), and then they make really loose, gross-looking dips with this stringy, fishy tasting crab meat. There will be at least one such example at any potluck thrown in the neighborhood. I never touch them. I've tried freezing in butter, cream and the rest--no good. They just don't freeze like king crab, lobster or shrimp do.
My wine shopping and I have never had a problem. Just a perpetual race between the bankruptcy court and Hell.--Rogov
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