WTN: 1959 Two Buck Chuck

Well, not exactly Two Buck Chuck. What we have here is a 1959 Hermann Hilbig Rheinhessen Oppenheimer Krotenbrunnen Riesling und Silvaner Nature Feine Spatlese. The Chuck connection is because that is about the quality level this wine probably represented nearly a half-century ago when it sold, and rightly so, for the equivalent of a few pennies.

The guy who bought it is a retired army colonel, then a lieutenant, and he hauled it around the world, storing it in sub-tropical BOQ closets, government quarter stairwells, and a mother-in-law's attic, and now he gives it to me, his friend, because he says he knows I "like old wine."

And tonight my wife and I set out to drink it.

The condition of the bottle? As far as I know there's no descriptor lower than low shoulder, but if this low shoulder were any lower a belly button would be showing. And the top of the cork looks like it's been nibbled on by generations of termites.

That's the bad news; now the good. What the termites didn't eat comes out without leaving more than a sprinkling of wood in the wine, which of course is oxydized, but not all that unpleasantly. Sherry is oxydized and I love it. That's the sort of oxydized this thing is -- not bad oxydized -- even though it doesn't smell like sherry. And while there's zero fruit, no secondary and tertiary characteristics, and little alcohol, most of it long since drunk by angels, there's the sort of good mouthfeel that comes only from glycerine. And despite the Silvaner there's good acid, and despite being nearly bone dry there is still a hint of sugar, just enough to make the wine marginally palatable.

And my wife and I drink it. Or at least some of it.

Which all goes to prove what? That Riesling is nearly impossible to destroy. Dilute it with Silvaner, damn near boil it in summer heat for nearly a half century, and it's still wine.

And while there's zero fruit, no secondary and tertiary characteristics, and little alcohol, most of it long since drunk by angels, there's the sort of good mouthfeel that comes only from glycerine..

I was wondering what it would show without fruit, tertiary characteristics, or alcohol..

Just curious, was this with dinner? What did you eat?

And while there's zero fruit, no secondary and tertiary characteristics, and little alcohol, most of it long since drunk by angels, there's the sort of good mouthfeel that comes only from glycerine..

I was wondering what it would show without fruit, tertiary characteristics, or alcohol..

Just curious, was this with dinner? What did you eat?

Rahsaan, the not-all-that-unpleasant oxydized flavors predominated, along with modest but OK acid and a touch of sweetness. (It may have been a real sweetie in its day for a Spatlese.) That's about it.

We opened the bottle before dinner, expecting to spit out the very first sip and pour the rest down the drain, but we finished the first two or three ounce glass and half the second and polished off the rest of that glass with the first few bites of a wild Alaskan sockeye salmon, an impossible match, of course. Given the low, low shoulder there wasn't a heck of a lot left for the drain. I hope that nobody thinks this is the sort of wine one would seek out for pleasure rather than curiosity, but given that the Riesling was diluted with Sylvaner and given its screwy provenance, the fact that it is still drinkable -- say, maybe about as drinkable as what the ancient Greeks drank -- seems to me remarkable.

The rest of the salmon was washed down with a rock-bottom cheapie generic Bourgogne, a 2002 Mongeard-Mugneret, which would possibly pass muster as a house wine in a bistrot in an end-of-the-line train station.

We opened the bottle before dinner, expecting to spit out the very first sip and pour the rest down the drain.

Aha, I guess it does make sense that you didn't build an entire meal around the bottle..

Speaking of salmon, had some "rock" salmon tonight with the 2004 Chandon de Briailles Ile des Vergelesses. Apparently the name dogfish doesn't entice people to purchase, so my fishmonger opted for the clever "rock salmon" label. As if the eel-like appearance wouldn't tip people off.

Fish was sub-par, wine was a bit tight and less thrilling than 3 months ago. But nice match.

Good luck with any more 59s you may have..

Rock Salmon! Now that's creative marketing. We once had our share of dogfish -- an ugly little shark -- here in the Puget Sound area in Washington State, but fisherman killed them. Now conservationists say there is a shortage and it's against the law to kill them.