Subway

I would hope that this clown's lawyer advised him in the strongest possible terms not to bring this tort action.

No tort action, this was a federal criminal case (misdemeanor, after Fed grand jury declined to approve felony charges).
I think instead of dunking booths that now fairs would have sandwich throwing booths with local celebrities as target.

In that case I'm surprised the prosecutor decided to press charges. There must have been a White House executive order or a lot of pressure from his bosses.

-Paul W.

Presumably if the guy had squirted a mustard bottle instead of tossing a sandwich he would have been charged with chemical warfare?

A war crime by using mustard gas.

Presumably if the guy had squirted a mustard bottle instead of tossing a sandwich he would have been charged with chemical warfare?

A war crime by using mustard gas.

True story: a couple of years ago, I was serving as an expert witness in a patent infringement lawsuit. The plaintiff (I was hired by defendents) was a "patent troll" in NJ claiming to have made a particular substance in a US patent he had received. When I reviewed the procedure he had published, I realized that the intermediate he described making and isolating was a nitrogen mustard! Since I knew that he operated out of a warehouse in NJ without fume hoods, I was a bit skeptical, to say the least.

The sandwich chain is missing a bet here - they should come out with special sandwiches like the Trooper Turkey, Cop Cuban, Nazi Nutella, Pig Pastrami, Fuzz Filet-O-Fish......

I wouldn't advise that. Why needlessly bring down the ire of the Trump administration?

-Paul W.

Agreed. The real question is: how much to buy the Earl of Sandwich peerage and confer it upon Dunn?

No tort action, this was a federal criminal case (misdemeanor, after Fed grand jury declined to approve felony charges).

Ah. I had heard that the grand jury dismissed the felony charges. I therefore assumed that the guy must have brought a civil suit. So it was a criminal misdemeanor assault case instead. One would have hoped that the Justice Department had more important things to do.

-Paul W.

Petty revenges are the order of the day.